So...BIG news at the Erickson house...
I am officially a 1st grade teacher at a school in the district I worked in before having my children! I know. CRAZY! I'll explain.
It is no secret to any of you who've known me for a while that I struggle with not having a career. I've felt called to be a teacher for almost as long as I can remember. Some of the best memories I have of the past year have been working in my daughters' prek classroom and remembering how it felt to help little ones, teach them something new, and just spend my time with a room full of kiddos. I always planned to go back to teaching once my kiddos were in school. As is usual for me, I think over the past month I realized that while that might have been my plan, God had a different one.
Let me back up a bit. You guys all know (or you most certainly should) that government employees and military personnel have been dealt a pretty rough hand of cards lately. For my family, these changes started taking place shortly after Parker was born. Slowly over time, little by little more and more things started effecting my husband (who is both military and a government employee). Shaun has been at the end of the hiring process for more jobs than I can count only to find out that a hiring freeze was instituted or the job was no longer being filled because of government budget concerns. We've gone so far as to meet with realtors to discuss putting our home on the market in preparation to move to DC before finding out those plans were dead ending so to speak. Even though he has the same job he's had forever, it is very draining to see the changes continue to happen and very scary to not know what is around the corner for us.
That brings us up to around August...after yet another attempt to switch jobs to avoid all this uncertainty fell through at the last minute, I made a crazy decision to send my resume out to one school. I mean hello, it is August. I've been out of the field for 5 years. No one will ever hire me I'm sure. In fact, I bet the position is already filled and just not removed from the website. I send the resume. One day passes. Two days pass. Three days pass. My predictions were all true.
Day 4. I get a response asking me to come in for an interview. *mouth drops to floor...No worries. I've been out for 5 years. It is August for goodness sake. They are going to have such a huge pool of people still looking for teachers. They will NEVER hire me.
Day 5. Freak out. What have I done?!?
Day 6. Interview: Shaun gets home late and therefore I'm running late to the interview. We have a BIG "discussion" we shall call it while I'm driving there. Yep, I'm so worked up. I'm going to blow this interview for sure. It doesn't really matter though because they are NEVER going to want me.
Interview goes well and I'm told they are hoping to make a decision by the middle of the following week, which is about 6 days away.
Come home. Chill out, relax, bask in my moment of happiness before rejection hits home.
Phone rings. HOLY CRAP they are calling me back. It's been 90 minutes. I don't answer. Of course I don't answer. What if they want me? What if I was so bad they already know they don't want me? I'm not sure I want the job. AND I'm supposed to have 6 days to figure out whether I will accept, which is wasted time because in 6 days I'm going to be rejected. I call my mom. I call my husband. While both are as helpful as they are capable of I'm really like, umm can I get God on speed dial here?!? This is above my pay grade and I need a little divine intervention. That thought makes me chuckle now.
I sit and think. Of course they aren't calling to offer or reject me yet. Silly me. I'm sure they just need to know my middle name. Or, more likely, one of my references has changed their phone number. I'm a stupid woman. Just call the principal back. She just wants to know to write 'S' where it says middle initial.
Day 6. Hour 2. I call back and I am promptly offered the position. Uhhhh....uhhh....what have I gotten myself into?!? I ask to have a little time to talk things over with my husband. I was planning on 6 days to get my thoughts clear and now I have 2 hours. Oh boy! I'm sure at this point the principal thinks I'm absolutely crazy because who applies and interviews, and only THEN needs time to talk things over with her spouse.
Day 6. Hour 6ish. I call back and accept.
In the days a week that follow I am a blubbering mess of emotions. I consider backing out. I decide to see what happens. I definitely decide I can't do this yet. I decide I might ought to see where it leads. I was an absolute crazy person for at least a week. And I cried my eyes out for hours every. single. day.
I should explain a little bit here. I've ALWAYS felt that I needed to stay home with my children. My oldest are school age now, but my youngest is only 2. That isn't completely true. I've always felt that either my husband or I needed to stay home with our children. If I was a brain surgeon, then he would've been mister mom for the past 5 years. The nature of my husband's job allows for him to work different hours. Basically his unit is a real world unit and so they run missions around the clock. I knew before I ever sent my resume off that he could stay at home with my son2, while my daughters went to work with me. Parker would still be able to go to preschool and hang at home and do all those things that my girls had a chance to do. But I wouldn't be the one with him. If you know Parker and I you know that we are sorta connected at the hip. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if some people think this separation will be a healthy change for us! Lol!
You'd think this would be an easy decision. It so wasn't.
Toward the end of the week of crazy Kristy, Shaun came home and told me that for at least 6 out of the next 9 months he would be home during the day everyday and working a different time of day. He said he's already asked if he could go ahead and do the full 9 months (because of my schedule which wasn't a problem).
So, let me get this straight....Tons of stress from husband being in the government/military field, I apply after 5 years off for a teaching position and get hired in 2 hours...in August, and now you've been told that you will basically be home everyday anyway?!?
It was at this point that I put all my fretting aside. In that moment, on a small level, I realized that perhaps my 'speed dial for divine intervention' wasn't needed. Perhaps God knew our stress, knew our desire for our girls to go to the school in the system where I taught, knew that I needed total peace of mind before I could get onboard with all those changes. Perhaps He just knew and laid it out and once again, I got let in on each little bit of it at the time I could handle. Perhaps.
Even with stepping forward feeling like this is what I'm supposed to be doing, I'm pretty sure this new adventure is a little nuts!
The pros are so obvious! First, I get to teach again! I get to have a career, pursue my professional ambitions again and I get to do all of that while my son is cared for by his daddy and my girls are done the hall next to me. They also get to go to all day kindergarten! You fellow educator friends get that without any explanation.
It will be difficult to adjust to our new routine. It will be insane to get a classroom set up in a couple of weeks (I've been buried under laminating film, bulletin board supplies, and curriculum binders for a week now and I still have SO much to do before my room is ready). It will be bittersweet to be away from Parker during the day. I will say though that his daddy is super pumped! Shaun's never had the opportunity to spend all day with his kiddos. He already has extravagant plans about taking Parker to preschool and then volunteering in G & L's classroom, being a Watch D.O.G.S dad, and having lunch with G & L on days he's already in Norman with P. (Side note: Could I be any more blessed and supported?!?)
So, the cat is out of the bag! I still intend to pursue my photography and other interests as well, but as my time allows. I realize that I'm stepping out further into the tightrope that so many women walk. It may seem that I'm buying a little more into the crap that women are asked to buy: that we can have it all, do it all, while giving 100% and feeling 0% guilt. I am not and do not believe that is true. I'm walking further out on the tightrope with faith knowing that I am not alone. I am far from it. I think sometime we get into this mindset that says there are only good and bad decisions. That decisions last forever. My life's taught me over and over that this is far from true. And that if this ends up not being the appropriate decision for me and my family, if this ends up being a "bad decision," I'll know that I made the best decision I could at the time with the information I had and that it is simply time to make a different decision.
So, working moms of the world, I join your ranks and I'm happy to be here!
I am officially a 1st grade teacher at a school in the district I worked in before having my children! I know. CRAZY! I'll explain.
It is no secret to any of you who've known me for a while that I struggle with not having a career. I've felt called to be a teacher for almost as long as I can remember. Some of the best memories I have of the past year have been working in my daughters' prek classroom and remembering how it felt to help little ones, teach them something new, and just spend my time with a room full of kiddos. I always planned to go back to teaching once my kiddos were in school. As is usual for me, I think over the past month I realized that while that might have been my plan, God had a different one.
Let me back up a bit. You guys all know (or you most certainly should) that government employees and military personnel have been dealt a pretty rough hand of cards lately. For my family, these changes started taking place shortly after Parker was born. Slowly over time, little by little more and more things started effecting my husband (who is both military and a government employee). Shaun has been at the end of the hiring process for more jobs than I can count only to find out that a hiring freeze was instituted or the job was no longer being filled because of government budget concerns. We've gone so far as to meet with realtors to discuss putting our home on the market in preparation to move to DC before finding out those plans were dead ending so to speak. Even though he has the same job he's had forever, it is very draining to see the changes continue to happen and very scary to not know what is around the corner for us.
That brings us up to around August...after yet another attempt to switch jobs to avoid all this uncertainty fell through at the last minute, I made a crazy decision to send my resume out to one school. I mean hello, it is August. I've been out of the field for 5 years. No one will ever hire me I'm sure. In fact, I bet the position is already filled and just not removed from the website. I send the resume. One day passes. Two days pass. Three days pass. My predictions were all true.
Day 4. I get a response asking me to come in for an interview. *mouth drops to floor...No worries. I've been out for 5 years. It is August for goodness sake. They are going to have such a huge pool of people still looking for teachers. They will NEVER hire me.
Day 5. Freak out. What have I done?!?
Day 6. Interview: Shaun gets home late and therefore I'm running late to the interview. We have a BIG "discussion" we shall call it while I'm driving there. Yep, I'm so worked up. I'm going to blow this interview for sure. It doesn't really matter though because they are NEVER going to want me.
Interview goes well and I'm told they are hoping to make a decision by the middle of the following week, which is about 6 days away.
Come home. Chill out, relax, bask in my moment of happiness before rejection hits home.
Phone rings. HOLY CRAP they are calling me back. It's been 90 minutes. I don't answer. Of course I don't answer. What if they want me? What if I was so bad they already know they don't want me? I'm not sure I want the job. AND I'm supposed to have 6 days to figure out whether I will accept, which is wasted time because in 6 days I'm going to be rejected. I call my mom. I call my husband. While both are as helpful as they are capable of I'm really like, umm can I get God on speed dial here?!? This is above my pay grade and I need a little divine intervention. That thought makes me chuckle now.
I sit and think. Of course they aren't calling to offer or reject me yet. Silly me. I'm sure they just need to know my middle name. Or, more likely, one of my references has changed their phone number. I'm a stupid woman. Just call the principal back. She just wants to know to write 'S' where it says middle initial.
Day 6. Hour 2. I call back and I am promptly offered the position. Uhhhh....uhhh....what have I gotten myself into?!? I ask to have a little time to talk things over with my husband. I was planning on 6 days to get my thoughts clear and now I have 2 hours. Oh boy! I'm sure at this point the principal thinks I'm absolutely crazy because who applies and interviews, and only THEN needs time to talk things over with her spouse.
Day 6. Hour 6ish. I call back and accept.
In the days a week that follow I am a blubbering mess of emotions. I consider backing out. I decide to see what happens. I definitely decide I can't do this yet. I decide I might ought to see where it leads. I was an absolute crazy person for at least a week. And I cried my eyes out for hours every. single. day.
I should explain a little bit here. I've ALWAYS felt that I needed to stay home with my children. My oldest are school age now, but my youngest is only 2. That isn't completely true. I've always felt that either my husband or I needed to stay home with our children. If I was a brain surgeon, then he would've been mister mom for the past 5 years. The nature of my husband's job allows for him to work different hours. Basically his unit is a real world unit and so they run missions around the clock. I knew before I ever sent my resume off that he could stay at home with my son2, while my daughters went to work with me. Parker would still be able to go to preschool and hang at home and do all those things that my girls had a chance to do. But I wouldn't be the one with him. If you know Parker and I you know that we are sorta connected at the hip. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if some people think this separation will be a healthy change for us! Lol!
You'd think this would be an easy decision. It so wasn't.
Toward the end of the week of crazy Kristy, Shaun came home and told me that for at least 6 out of the next 9 months he would be home during the day everyday and working a different time of day. He said he's already asked if he could go ahead and do the full 9 months (because of my schedule which wasn't a problem).
So, let me get this straight....Tons of stress from husband being in the government/military field, I apply after 5 years off for a teaching position and get hired in 2 hours...in August, and now you've been told that you will basically be home everyday anyway?!?
It was at this point that I put all my fretting aside. In that moment, on a small level, I realized that perhaps my 'speed dial for divine intervention' wasn't needed. Perhaps God knew our stress, knew our desire for our girls to go to the school in the system where I taught, knew that I needed total peace of mind before I could get onboard with all those changes. Perhaps He just knew and laid it out and once again, I got let in on each little bit of it at the time I could handle. Perhaps.
Even with stepping forward feeling like this is what I'm supposed to be doing, I'm pretty sure this new adventure is a little nuts!
The pros are so obvious! First, I get to teach again! I get to have a career, pursue my professional ambitions again and I get to do all of that while my son is cared for by his daddy and my girls are done the hall next to me. They also get to go to all day kindergarten! You fellow educator friends get that without any explanation.
It will be difficult to adjust to our new routine. It will be insane to get a classroom set up in a couple of weeks (I've been buried under laminating film, bulletin board supplies, and curriculum binders for a week now and I still have SO much to do before my room is ready). It will be bittersweet to be away from Parker during the day. I will say though that his daddy is super pumped! Shaun's never had the opportunity to spend all day with his kiddos. He already has extravagant plans about taking Parker to preschool and then volunteering in G & L's classroom, being a Watch D.O.G.S dad, and having lunch with G & L on days he's already in Norman with P. (Side note: Could I be any more blessed and supported?!?)
So, the cat is out of the bag! I still intend to pursue my photography and other interests as well, but as my time allows. I realize that I'm stepping out further into the tightrope that so many women walk. It may seem that I'm buying a little more into the crap that women are asked to buy: that we can have it all, do it all, while giving 100% and feeling 0% guilt. I am not and do not believe that is true. I'm walking further out on the tightrope with faith knowing that I am not alone. I am far from it. I think sometime we get into this mindset that says there are only good and bad decisions. That decisions last forever. My life's taught me over and over that this is far from true. And that if this ends up not being the appropriate decision for me and my family, if this ends up being a "bad decision," I'll know that I made the best decision I could at the time with the information I had and that it is simply time to make a different decision.
So, working moms of the world, I join your ranks and I'm happy to be here!
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